How Does Your Voice Sound?

I got so many compliments on my voice at the horse fair: how soothing and relaxing it was. So, as with any compliment, I think about how I can do it more. In the Pavillion at the Iowa Horse Fair, Don Pecos was a little unnerved about hearing my voice from me and booming overhead on the sound system. In fact, he tried to climb on top of me to stop the dual action voice. Hence the soothing relaxing voice which captivated the audience and bought offers to read bed time stories to children.

In working with horses and children, I use my voice to sound like the feeling I wish to convey: encouraging, soothing, complimentary. When I say the word 'good', I think of warm chocolate chip cookies or you've just won the lottery. Try it: say good and think of the best thing you can think of while you say it. How did that sound? Now say it like an army sergeant drilling troops. Which 'good' will a horse/child respond to if that individual needs encouragement?

Dealing with horses takes a good measure of empathy and understanding. If I had got annoyed at Don Pecos for trying to hide from booming voice #2 and used drill sergeant voice because he was frightened, he would have become more and more fractious. A person who shouts "Whoa!" in a shrill, high pitched voice is rarely going to have the desired effect of calming the horse and getting him to stand. What that voice sounds like is: I'm terrified, you're terrified, stand here because we're both going to get eaten by the predator neither of us can see. So, consider in horse language that "WHOA!" sounds an awful lot like "RUN!"

Telling the same frightened 1000lb animal: your [sic] FINE, is like telling a crying child he's fine. The horse/child does not feel FINE, they have a problem. It sounds like you don't care about the fear/pain. Your FINE is a quick, staccato dismissal; it lacks empathy entirely. Saying : you're-all-right [note the contraction, hyphenation and lack of capital letters] in a caring, soothing way sets you up to help disperse the fear/pain. It says: I know you are having a difficult time, but I will help you and everything will turn out just fine. See, I said fine.

Don't believe me? Ask your husband how you look. He says: fine. You get mad/hurt. Fine means many things: superior, elegant, tiny, healthy, sharp, keen, highly skilled, etc. How did he say it? Distracted, dismissive? You ask you wife what is wrong. She says: Nothing. You say: Ok. She says: Fine. If you are shaking your head right now and half smiling you know: Nothing is not wrong and fine is not bright and clear.

Listen to the sound of your voice and let your words sound like what you want them to mean.

Kind Regards,

Michelle Blackler

Serendipity

www.hossbiz.com

Serendipity is an Accidental Sagacity Corporation company.

Where Can I Get A Horse Like That?

Pecos [from a collection of photos of Fred & Jeanne Herrick]

People often ask me this about the Cheval Morgans. Truth is: you breed them. They don't just happen. I've written here about Fleetwing, now it's time for Pecos. The New York Morgan Horse Society posted a trivia question on facebook this week featuring Don Pecos's great grand sire, so I thought it was serendipity.

Pecos [AMHA 8969] was born in 1944 and sired 104 foals. I first fell for him when I was 14 years old and saw the photo below in "The Morgan Horse In Pictures" by Margaret Cabell Self. He was 26 when this photo was taken. The caption was something like: Pecos shedding his years and clowning like a colt.

Fred Herrick trained, showed and stood Pecos at stud for many of the horse's years and has a fond place in his heart for the great stud. "He had to show off all the time," Fred recalled. Jeanne [Mellin Herrick] told me that Pecos had a lot of heart, but he could be a little ornery, at times. She said, somewhat under her breath, that was why he and Fred got along so well.

I sent Fred and Jeanne a photo of Don Pecos [who has two crosses to Pecos in his bloodlines] as a two year old and Jeanne sent me a photo of a painting she made of Pecos noting how much they resembled each other. I am honored to have such a direct link to a horse I only knew in photos, paintings and stories, but whose blood lives on in my daily life through Don Pecos.

Kind Regards,

Michelle Blackler

Serendipity

www.hossbiz.com

Serendipity is an Accidental Sagacity Corporation company.

Autism and Horse Training

Don Pecos du Cheval, the beginning of his bending 'problem': carrying his head to the left

I decided to address Don Pecos' bending 'problem' with the solution posed to me by absolutely everyone: the whip. In carriage driving the whip is an aid in lieu of leg aides as in riding. The idea is that the whip uses the whip to touch the side of the horse to encourage bending. I have been loathe to use the whip in this way with Don Pecos because his idea of the whip touching his sides is more closely attuned to sticking him with a cattle prod. Yet, I wondered, "Could everyone else be wrong?"

So, yesterday, I hitched him with the plan of only walking, encouraging him to accept the bend with a whisper from the whip. It was hot, a dry wind whipped around and the damned flies were busy tormenting us both. Don Pecos was still a little gimpy from slipping in the mud two weeks ago. Walk, walk, walk.

Yeah, right. The first time I touched him with the whip- note, I said touched, not clobbered, not lashed, not whipped- touched, he jumped out of his skin and took off trotting like a Saddlebred. The second, third and fiftieth time I touched him with the whip was the same. I spent an hour and a half trying to get him to walk, accept the aid and calm down. In the end, he kind of moved over, kind of walked and so I quit, ready to cry.

I thought about my post about Dashiell and Autism. It seemed so wrong to impose my world on Don Pecos when he was just trying to get by without any fuss, just doing the wrong job because that was what we were telling him to do, albeit inadvertently. I thought about how painful it is for Dashiell when the world changes its mind and its agenda. That is exactly how Don Pecos was reacting to the whip.

I know the whip is an important aid. I rarely use it, and as a result, I had a frightened, fire breathing locomotive in my hands yesterday. I will have to try again today and I'm dreading it. Some times horse training sucks. I guess this is what my sister feels about being a mother to her precious boy. So, as she's taught me, I'll do what I have to with empathy and great love and hope everyone else is right about the solution.

Kind Regards,

Michelle Blackler

Serendipity

www.hossbiz.com

Serendipity is an Accidental Sagacity Corporation company.

Trisomy Awareness Month

Michele, Don Pecos and Lucy welcome Morgan to his therapeutic riding lesson

Morgan came for his therapeutic riding lesson on Wednesday. We had two special treats: the weather was fine and Morgan's Dad, Mike came to watch. Michele was able to join us as Don Pecos's leader and everyone was in great form. Morgan was smiling and shifting his seat to encourage Don Pecos to extend the walk. Pecos obliged and Michele got a good workout, too.

I've talked about Morgan in the past, but as March is Trisomy Awareness month, I wanted to add some information about this condition. In Trisomy 18 there are three chromosome #18 instead of the usual two. It is a life threatening anomaly in which 90% of children born with it will not survive. Trisomy 18 is diagnosed in one in 3,000 births.

Morgan is in the 10% of children with Trisomy 18 who live past their first birthday. He has many other challenges including Type I Diabetes and epilepsy, but he is a living miracle and reason for the rest of us to marvel at the beauty of life, in all its incantations.

He has taught me many lessons and my life is a richer place because Morgan is in it. When he laughs, the world is a better place. When you look for joy in unlikely places, like Trisomy 18, you find even greater wonder.

Kind Regards,

Michelle Blackler

Serendipity

www.hossbiz.com

Serendipity is an Accidental Sagacity Corporation company.

Relationships at Serendipity

Bob Nervig and I had a photo shoot a while back and I wanted to share the results. Bob and Don Pecos are developing into quite a team, as these photos show.

We have all transitioned over to the Polish marathon vehicle that Michael Scott so graciously lent us. But, I surmise that Bob's first carriage love will always be the gig.

It is my greatest pleasure to teach carriage driving to individuals and watch them develop a relationship with the horses of Serendipity. Bob and Pecos are the proof.

Bob's wife Kathy produces gorgeous scrapbooks. These photos are meant to be included in one for Bob on his carriage driving adventures. I can't wait to see her artwork when it's finished.

Kind Regards,

Michelle Blackler

Serendipity

www.hossbiz.com

Serendipity is an Accidental Sagacity Corporation company.

Therapeutic Riding: Morgan, his Morgan and Michel[l]es

The Wednesday Night Team

I wish I knew how many miles Morgan, Michele and I have traveled together in the last six years. Walking next to Don Pecos last night, I felt the usual comfortable unity of our team. Pecos and I marching, swinging, consistent, Michele and Morgan moving back and forth, side to side and up and down with the rhythm of the movement, Morgan's mom, Holly snapping photos in the gorgeous late summer sunlight.

This is a blog. I have to remind myself to resist my natural tendency towards verbosity. For I could go on and on and on telling the stories of how this little boy has taught me lessons in life. Conversely, I could write about the many times I have experienced extraordinary boundless friendship with Michele and Holly. I can never say enough about the beauty of Don Pecos. But, suffice it to say thirty minutes on Wednesday go very fast, and so easily. All those minutes, all those miles, remain among my most cherished.

If I was to make a music video of the Wednesday Night Therapy Team, it would be set to the Eagles' song, Peaceful, Easy Feeling.

Enough talk. Let the photos speak...

A Kid and the Ultimate Carriage Driving Machine

There really is nothing like driving a finely tuned, super charged horse.

I hitched Pecos yesterday for a fun birthday lesson for one of my clients. She and Pecos have a chemistry that is awesome. She feeds off his power and speed. He senses her verve and fearlessness. Her mother and I often stand there regarding them with our hearts in our mouths, but they stick like glue, the Daring Duo. Did I mention this kiddo is 9?

So she and Don Pecos are careening around the cones course I set up to train Ace with earlier: complex angles, tight, tight turns. Her first attempt she clocks 1:13 with several cones down. I am telling her to, "Slow down! Slow DOWN! SLOW DOWN!" Her mother remarks with that should-I-be-concerned-tone, that it looked the gig was on one wheel some of the time. We discuss an alternate route through the cones, and I tell her to go a little more s-l-o-w-l-y so she can be precise. Her next time is 1:09, one penalty. Yep. Tweleve sets of cones over 40m x 80m. In sand.

Well, I had to see if this course really was that fast. If you read Wednesday's blog, you know how I feel about cones. I am not going to tell you what my time was. I am going to tell you that I am a very fine instructor. I am going to tell you I have very talented clients. Very talented, 9 year old clients. And a very fast, finely tuned, super charged bad boy prince charming, Don Pecos.

Have a serendipitous weekend!

Training Special Horses at Serendipity

One of the many pleasures of training horses for the Serendipity curriculum is the moment when the horse reaches the stage where he believes he's a show horse. The weeks of conditioning take away the sound of his hooves, his step is a spring, his neck sculpts into a crest, he raises his eyelids and looks widely at you. He knows he is special.

Ace has got to that stage. His extension is still a little wobbly, but he is working his heart out on it. The transition from baby sitter to ballet dancer doesn't happen overnight, and it is a credit to his breeding and disposition that he has got so far, so fast.

The longer I know Ace, the more he reminds me of his dam, Whitmorr Topaz. He shares her love of carriage driving obstacle courses: fast, fast trot, downshift, spin, more fast trot, turn, turn turn, go, go, go, stop, fast, turn, faster, turn, fastest trot, yeah! Topaz gave me three impeccable horses-Ace, Major and Don Pecos. They can all spin the gig 360 degrees at a working trot without moving the inside wheel. They love it, too.

Perhaps they enjoy it because the whip is having a ball, you might tell me. Yes, I agree to a certain extent. However, the fact remains that I hate cones courses. I do not enjoy them. And yet I trained all the above horses, and more, who do love cones courses. Maybe it's Morgans. Maybe it's Topaz's offspring. Who knows really.

One thing is for sure, they know they're special. You can see it when they move.